The Perfect Relationship….well for me it is!
A good friend of mine asked me what do you think is the secret in having a happy 10 year relationship that you guys have? Well besides being blown away with a left of field question, I was also flattered. She was right though; I do have a beautiful marriage with my husband and thought ok I will do my very best in sharing what makes it work for us.
So I went on to answer her question best way I could.
Tip #1
Always treat each other with the same grace and patience that you had when you first started dating. My husband told me a great example of patience in a relationship. He said “If we were dating and were in the car about to leave to go out for lunch and you said you ‘forgot your jacket’ I would stop the car and tell you “no problem run up and grab it as you might get cold”. As years go by and couples start to get comfortable with each other, patience and willingness to impress each other has a tendency to die as we have now achieved our goal (having a relationship) . Fast track a few years ahead and if the exact same situation happened again with you forgetting your jacket I could respond and say “ now we’re going to be late”, or “we dont have time to get it- you’ll be fine it’s not that cold” the reaction may be completely different.
The moral to the story is treat each other the way you would when you were first dating. Treat them the same as the person you would like to impress, treat each other with the same manners, the same patience and the same optimistic view of a situation.
Tip #2
Just like dating for the first time, a man always has a tendency to compliment the female in what she is wearing, how beautiful her hair looks and vise versa for female to male. Its important to keep this up; yes you might get used to what each other looks like, but when was the last time you gave a genuine feel good compliment on to your partner?
Remember a genuine compliment is one of detail; example “your hair looks really great up in a ponytail, it shows off your sexy neck” ; “the colour of your shirt really brings out your eyes”; “gee you have a beautiful smile, it makes me so happy to see you smiling like that”. Yes it might sound corny but when you say it and the other hears it will make us glow…we wont be thinking that sounded corny.
Tip #3
TOUCH!!! Keep touching each other. When you were first dating all you wanted to do was touch him or her for the first time, then it was kiss them for the first time, then it was have sex for the first time. You were so focused on touching the other person! ……A lot of relationships fail because they stop touching. This is the one thing that keeps a relationship strong romantically.
Sit on the lounge and watch tv next to each other, my husband and I normally are holding hands without realizing and always tend to have one foot touching too. It makes me giggle sometimes cause we dont even realised we’ve locked limbs.
When you walk down the street are you to busy running after your kids to hold hands? If you have two children try this; you and your partner hold hands and then a child holds your hands on either side of you. Dont let children get in the way or be the excuse of not touching. Bringing children up in a loving kinesthetic environment makes them at an unconscious level feel as though they have a stable home life. They also are more open with communicating their feelings to the parents.
Any tips that makes your relationship work? Post your comments and feedback below we’d love to hear your tips.
Regards
Annette Lackovic